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Online Christian Marriage Coach Counseling Service, With Pastor Michael, Marriage Coach Counseling
No Better Love in Life than God’s Soulmate
For myself and those blessed to be sharing love and intimacy with their God-ordained loving soulmate in a Godly marriage, there is simply no better human experience or human connection; than marriage.
However, I work with individuals and couples, through my online Christian marriage Coach counseling service every day, that confirm unhappy marriages are painful, lonely and they have great potential to destroy lives.
Trust is one of the biggest issues in unhappy marriages and responsible for many once happy and successful marriages failing. Trust is a very powerful relationship ingredient and liberating emotion, not only for successful marriages, but all human interactions.
Marriage vows or the keeping of them, are all based on trust. We trust that our spouse will keep and honor their vows. Trust is an essential element of the marriage covenant. It’s what liberates us from the insecurities commonly found in unmarried relationships; and empowers married couples to reach their individual and union potentials.
While infidelity may be the ultimate betrayal of marriage vows and the ultimate trust destroyer, commonly it’s often seemingly innocent and insignificant actions that erode trust and marriage harmony. According to my Online Christian Marriage Coach Counseling Service clients, it’s not cheating that is responsible for most of their marriage difficulties. Most unhappiness stems from being taken for granted.
Most Christian weddings vows include the traditional promises to LOVE, HONOUR and CHERISH; and we trust that our beloved husbands and wives will keep these precious promises. However, interestingly it’s not keeping or even understanding the promise to CHERISH that causes much marriage discontent.
LOVE & HONOUR – are the big-ticket items for marriage. LOVE is tenderness and affectionateness. Love is kindness, devotional, charity and generosity. Love is obsessional and desperate in the extreme. Love is desire, romantic or sexual attraction, physical and emotional intimacy. Love is deep affection and attachment. In its truest form, love is unconditional and selfless; after God’s love, this kind of love is more common to Mother’s and their Babies. After Jesus, Mothers give us a shining example of how to love unconditionally.
According to Online Christian Marriage Coach Counseling Service provider, Pastor Michael (Christian Marriage Coach Counseling), HONOUR is sadly a model of character that has long been in decline in the western world. In today’s culture the concept of honor seems dated, old-fashioned and misunderstood by many today. Interestingly, at the same time as the honor among us declines, crime rates in the community continue to rise; lack of respect (honor), self-respect and self-esteem has been linked to reasons perpetrators commit crimes.
It’s easy to appreciate that a community with no honor or respect for self or others will suffer higher crime rates. The type of person that has no honor and no respect can live with his crimes, their foremost concern is not to get caught. A person who has honor and self-respect cannot live easily with himself; and the sense of shame he would likely suffer by committing illegal and immoral acts.
According to Online Christian Marriage Counseling Service Provider, Pastor Michael, (Marriage Counseling Service), honor or my definition of its meaning, is the lifeblood of a Godly marriage. HONOUR – what does it mean, it means: high respect, great esteem, a tribute to glory or glorify actions in merit of credit. Doing the right and moral thing, even at the risk of personal loss, is both brave and honorable.
However, HONESTY and TRUTH are the foundation of honor in my humble opinion. Being honest and to be truthful is a Godly attribute. Because most of us no longer understand or value honor or honorable actions and characteristics, dishonesty is easily learned; it becomes the norm to say what fits and what benefits us as individuals.
While many of us may have happily moved past and forgotten one of humanities greatest virtues, honor. We still know what the opposite of honor is, DISGRACE or SHAME! Hence, the reason we prefer not to get caught, when wrongdoing and lying. The price of not being honorable and honest, and to be discovered, is to be seen as a disgrace and embarrassment; thankfully, shame is still well understood.
HONOUR in marriage, is to honor the marriage vows, the marriage and your spouse. Your husband or wife is a gift from heaven, a Godly gift that you should be grateful for and respect above all things. Consider the amount of loneliness in the world, the amount of pain and suffering loneliness creates; and thank God, for His Grace you are loved.
To Honor is to respect someone or something, normally an agreement or commitment. All marriage troubles and breakdowns begin with not honoring our spouses, marriage vows and our commitments to the marriage. The not honoring of the precious marriage vows and promises is what causes most harm in marriages; and leads to much unhappiness and negative outcomes.
The underdog of the marriage promises is the promise to CHERISH. I love the word cherish. I see it as the underdog, because again many couples don’t understand or appreciate its importance. Yet, by neglecting to cherish our spouse is to take them for granted; and taking your spouse for granted is often the first step towards feelings of isolation and unhappiness in a marriage.
So, what does CHERISH even mean? I’m often asked about the meaning of the “to Cherish”, part of traditional wedding vows. As a Pastor and Online Christian Marriage Counseling Service Provider, when working with clients of my Christian Marriage Counseling service, I will often talk about what it means to cherish; and how vital it is to healthy marriages.
My definition of ‘Cherish’ in a marriage, is to – LOVE WITH ENTHUSIASM. Enthusiasm comes from the Greek word – Enthousiasmou, meaning “to be inspired or possessed by God”. So, my definition of Cherish, is to LOVE WITH ENTHUSIASM, meaning, “to love like you are inspired or possessed by God”.
If you love your spouse with enthusiasm, like you are inspired and possessed by God, you love with passion, you love with compassion, you love with appreciation, you love with gratitude. When you love someone in this way, it’s impossible to take them for granted. To love with enthusiasm means to never take your partner for granted; this is to cherish our spouse and to honor God’s great gift of love and marriage.
When we cherish someone, we do not take them for granted. I think it’s impossible to take someone for granted, if we truly cherish them. If we take our spouse for granted, we are NOT keeping our marriage vows. We promise to LOVE and CHERISH.
Quite simply, it’s taking for granted and not cherishing our husbands and wives that most often erodes the bonds of marriage; and this inevitability leads to unhappiness and marriage breakdowns.
GET HELP NOW – Online Christian Marriage Coach Counseling Service, With Pastor Michael, Marriage Coach Counseling